A Date (?) With Miss Shanghai

Miss Shanghai is “the artist formerly known as” Married Chinese Girl.

I met the her a few years ago. She sat next to me in a café and I picked her up. We became FB friends. This is the girl from this post — she is friends with the Taiwanese girl.

At the time we met, she told me she “had a BF,” but she is actually married to him, originally for citizenship, but I think it’s real now. I see them together on FB all the time… she is a very attractive girl, and I have been “burning” for her for years. This one pic of her in a jaccuzzi on a highrise balcony hurts me to look at… she’s my type.

We went out to brunch soon after I met her… great date. She dressed fucking hot… thigh-high boots and a skirt. Wow. Then I took her out for lunch one time, back to my house for some art… she was dressed in tiny shorts and a sports bra… fucking sexy. I had her in my place, touched her, but didn’t make any real moves. I have always thought since then that that was a mistake. I blew my chance, and put myself in the “weak guy” category. That might all be true. We went out to dinner once soon after that, but the door was closed. Lame date, and I stayed away from her after that. Some tussle there.

We chat, from time to time. She occasionally asks me for a drink. We had tea once. Meditated once together. Nothing too sexy.

She asked to see me last week. I am horny for this girl, but didn’t think it was a sexual thing, so I ignored it. She asked again, so I set up a date. Lunch. I had asked for a weekend, but she said no… weekday, during the day (which is when her husband works, that’s my guess as to why that is important). This was feeling like sex to me.

So lunch. Then my place for art. That was the plan… to hang out, then start playing with her hair, tell her it smells good, and then start kissing her neck… see how that goes.

I asked Yohami what he thought. He doesn’t know her… he only knows what I’m posting here above… here’s what he said:

“She wanted you since the beginning. Usually chicks invent a boyfriend to keep guys at a distance. This one is married and tried to portray herself more available than she actually is. She’s served on a plate.”

“She wants to fuck, the ball is in your court. Make it happen.”
— Yohami

That was my read too. That she always wanted to fuck. And/or, her relationship is even more stale, so… she’s ready. Or… me sexing her little friend made me a little more sparkly.

She shows up today… looking a little older, but still hot. Sweatshirt. Tight yoga pants. Her ass looked a little thicker, which is great. She’s barely 100 lbs now. We had lunch and walked back to my place. Everything felt cool.

We get in, she loves the cats. She asks for tea… and I’m wondering if I even need to wait for the water to boil before I make my move.

I do wait for the water to boil. I’m boiling too. I get our tea ready. It feels tense. I don’t know if she can feel it. Maybe this whole thing is all in my head.

She is standing at the counter, on her laptop, and I start playing with her hair. She is letting me do it, but at one point pulls it away. At another, she asks if there is something funny about her hair.

Anyway… I make my move. Reach up for her head and move in. No announcement. And she rejects the kiss. She does not look tempted.

And I say, “you’re alright,” and her face shows a little concern. And I hold that position, watching her, and she says I’m making her uncomfortable. I ask if she is being real, and her face is very real. So I say okay, and back up. And she asks if I have any “girlfriends” that I don’t want to have sex with. And I say yeah… and stare at her… and it’s tense.

She says she’s not into blondes. That’s exactly what the Online Girl told me. That’s twice in one week. I’m not assuming that is a real objection. She might have 100 reason why I’m not sexable. Who knows. But that’s what she said.

So I back off. We both sit… but I’m flustered. Very tense. We chat a bit more… I’m uncomfortable. Not freaking out, but the air is thick with tension.

Being rejected by her stung. She is sexual a “loose end” from my past, and I had hoped to clean that up today. I’m internally holding the disappointment in myself for not pulling the trigger, years ago. Today I made my move, but this did not work out.

Maybe she never wanted to fuck me? I think Yohami’s read is right… for the situation, but maybe she’s the exception? Or maybe I mis-played something today? Or maybe she was on her period (but I don’t think so). Or maybe she really doesn’t like blondes? Or maybe there is something else about me she doesn’t like?

It is interesting she didn’t think to mention her husband as the objection. Hmmm.

Regardless of all that guesswork… she left pretty quickly after that. Good. I was relieved. I still feel flustered.

I’m glad about the whole thing… even if I am uncomfortable. She’s not a real “friend” to me, in the sense that she/I are deep. She is a girl that made me an orbiter, that’s how I see it. And as of today, she knows it’s dangerous to put me in that box.

Bigger picture… I want to focus on girls that are into me. I like her, but… life is too short for me to spend much time with girls that don’t want to give me the kind of time and attention I want. Her, out of the way, gives me more focus for the next round of girls (not like she was really holding me back).

This one was complicated. One thing I love about daygame is you can meet new girls (in theory, and often in practice), that you have no connection to, so there’s no “complication,” no baggage. Won’t always work out, but it’s a more clean slate than this one.

Ahh… was I an aggressive dick to a nice girl today? I don’t know. I feel distracted. I feel frustrated. I feel a little “typical bro” — not that that is a bad thing.

If I had it to do over, I’d do it the same… assuming she came to my house. If a girl comes into my cave, I bite her. Period. Or… lunch, just friends, and don’t let it take up much time.

I doubt I’ll see her again. I didn’t apologize. And I won’t. I don’t feel bad. I do feel “complicated.” I’m curious is she’ll say anything later.

Okay… back to my daygame girls. And speaking of… I think I have a date with a 19 year old girl tomorrow. She’s younger than she is hot, but she made my cock hard on the sidewalk doing nothing special besides giggling. We’ll see how that goes.

On with the show.