First Date with Miss Tester
I want to get back to my Tokyo stories, but I have a fresh one from here at home… from this last Friday… let’s do this story first. She is the first date I’ve had with a “new” girl from daygame since I’ve been back from Japan. No notch, but it was a great date with an interesting girl.
She needs a name so we’ll call her Miss Tester.
I met her about a week ago, on a day I talked to 17 girls. I am not taking notes on my approaches since I’ve been back from Japan, but I know she was one of the first girls of the day.
She was crossing an intersection when I saw her. She is a short Asian girl, not super young, but much younger than me. I found out later she was 28. What I remember about those first moments was that she had lovely pale skin, a glimmer in her eyes, and that she wore nice clothes…
In Japan, I was talking about how I tend to date a lot of girls that make claims about being virgins, or girls that don’t drink, etc. I know I have an usual amount of stories like that for a daygamer. What is interesting for me is that they all start with cold approach on the street… I pick them up based on their “look,” based on superficial clues. Every girl is different, but those surface clues tend to lead me to a certain type of girl over and over.
And what is the “look” I am attracted to? The look is… that she is conservative. At least on the outside.
It's my "filtering?" It has to be.
Some of it is that these girls are Asians, from Asia (even when I am at home). But I am "filtering" to girls that don't look DTF. I'm guessing that is it. There is something about them I like. And they hook with me.
— Nash (@DaysOfGame_com) February 21, 2018
Sometimes I need to state the opposite… so I’ll say it now:
Of course I want girls that like sex. The point is that I am not interested in girls that wear obvious sexuality on their sleeves. I avoid girls that look overly “Instagram.” I like the kind of sexuality that is in a girls eyes or in her walk. And I avoid girls that wear a lot of makeup… or ones that are “try hard” in their attempts to use sex to get attention. I am not into that kind of display at all.
I want girls that present themselves as “traditional.” Not old fashioned, necessarily… but modest. I want what we sometimes call “classy,” but I don’t like that word… I like “graceful” instead. I like “introverted”… I target that too, in particular. I don’t totally know how I got here, but I am a type of expert at having a great time with “nice girls”… girls that are almost always more exciting than their conservative looks might suggest.
I think all of this points back to good parenting… I think most all the girls I date have solid parents, and are thus… attractive girls… inside and out.
(As I write this… I don’t think we have to go out of our way to look for “sexual girls.” I think we should look for the “type” of girl we want… and then just assume they will be sexual. Sexuality in a girl is normal. I think that’s why I can target “conservative” girls, and my date-to-fuck ratio is very similar to guys that don’t attract “virgins” or “non drinkers” or overly modest girls. Sex, for girls, is normal… you don’t have to target it.)
So I stopped this girl… and she was receptive. Right away, there was a little sparkle of acknowledgment in her eyes. I know very little about this girl at this point, but I have seen her eyes dance through several psychological states. I have seen her confident. I have seen her childlike. I have seen her irritated. I have seen her in a passionate frenzy. She has a complex personality. I like her.
Back to her conservative side: As we talked on the sidewalk, she told me she was from China. And that she is an auditor for a “Big Five” company. Based on those two bits of information alone… it was easy for me put together a semi-accurate profile of her psychology and her position in the social class. Those clues are not necessarily “attractive” to me, not at all. Being a very successful accountant from a good family… isn’t “sexy”. But… I want to fish in the pools where girls like this swim. High-end girls, from stable/successful families. Those characteristics are the foundation I like, as long as we sprinkle sexy-sweetness on top of all that good culture.
Even from the early moments on the street, I could tell she wasn’t “boring.” She has some “edge” to her. There is a “directness” to her personality… at least once I was in front of her, doing my thing. My vibe brought out her “A” game. She was showing hints of spicy right away.
I said something like… “yeah, I will admit, you look conservative on the outside…that’s attractive to me… that is part of why I stopped you.” But even as I said it, it was in contrast to a sexual twinkle in those eyes. I told her then that “the outside” wasn’t always a good indication of “the inside”… and she gave me another big smile as a reward.
I don’t know why, but I know I used some generic “qualification” question with her… something like “what do you like to do for fun.” I never say that kind of thing to girls, but I did with her… almost by accident. I could tell it was “on” between us when she complied with an answer… telling me she was taking dance classes. What kind, I asked? Hip hop, she said.
If you know that I dance, you might know that that is a perfect answer by my standards…. the Chinese, auditor that likes hip hop. Good girl.
I took her number, moved on with my day. I wasn’t super excited, but I was interested.
I messaged her the next day:
NASH: Hey dancer… cool to meet up yesterday.
NASH: I have a theory about what it takes to be a good dancer… ready to hear it?
I know it’s specific to the situation… but that is a very good ping text, IMAO.
We have the standard nickname (calling her “dancer”). That works well, as that’s not really her thing… that’s her side hobby, and likely a nice break from her self-image as a finance girl.
And then we have the hint at some “special theory” I have… but I don’t say it right away… I make her ask for more. I like “are you ready to hear it” better than “would you like to hear it.” That’s much better.
And then… regardless of the content of my ping… I like to ask a question as the last part of the message in my ping texts. It is true, we are not supposed to constantly ask questions. Especially not boring questions. But I notice I am doing a lot more questions now… and it’s going fine… I am using questions as a form of leading. I like ending my ping texts with questions these days… as it prompts a response. And I think it works to nudge her forward into conversation.
There was her reply. Not super enthusiastic, but we were off and running.
I gave her my theory: Good dancers have a base of rhythm… but that when a dancer can show he anticipates the changes in the music… that is what makes him stand out. I am correct about that. And this is good “mastery” to dump on a girl.
Related to my last post… dancing is an area where I have some VALUE to offer. Some guys will argue that
everyone girls like value. Those guys are right.
“Game is about building value and then learning to deliver that value.”
That ^ is a truism from
And while I agree that girls are not great at sniffing out your “hidden value”… value remains a huge part of what makes/breaks us in the SMP. And TheRedQuest is correct… we have to DELIVER that value… or it remains hidden and useless to the seduction.
This text exchange is an example of me having some relevant value AND getting it out in front of her so she can see it… and so she can respond. I am a good dancer, and that is still obscured from her (she has never seen me dance). But my “dance theory” is now something she can see… my game here is a “delivery vehicle” that transmits my value to the girl.
And she liked it…
HER: Lol you forgot one thing
That ^ is a great response. More spice from her.
I don’t know about you, but when a girl is talking to me about being flexible… in the context of man to woman… it’s always sexual. I don’t know why, but that is true for me.
HER: It makes a huge difference
NASH: Now I am curious how flexible you are
NASH: I am trying to imagine the cute auditor girl… in hip hop clothes
See how I “always text less than her”… and “make her wait?” See how I am always working to “make her chase?” See how I am running “cool guy game” here? No… I’m not doing any of that tired stuff here.
I’m not “playing it cool” at all. I am on my hustle… demonstrating charisma. I am using game to deliver value, value, value. In my “performer/critic/fan” model of seduction, I am still in the “performer” phase… but I have her attention. She is in the role of “involved critic,” and part-way to being a “fan.”
HER: Wait am I in someone’s fantasy right now?
NASH: You started it… with all that “flexible” talk
And just like that, she and I were “on.” We bantered a little bit more and I asked her out:
NASH: Hey… I want to see you.
NASH: Dinner tomorrow? Or maybe something on Saturday during the day?
That ^ is two choices. That is my standard way to ask a girl out… give her two choices, usually (but not this time), two+ days apart… so she can take the near option (if she’s excited) or a later option (if she is a planner).
HER: Tomorrow sounds good.
I made a reservation and had her meet me at a restaurant near my house. It’s a place I have taken several girls… they are beginning to know me, and they always sit me side by side (which is a requirement for my kind of dinner date)… and it’s a five minute car ride to my front door. Great logistics.
She showed up about 10 minutes late. She wore a big smile and a nice black dress.
The dress was symbolic as well… it covered her shoulders… and all of the skin on her arms, all the way past her wrists… just her little finger tips sticking out (very feminine and cute). But the neckline of her dress dipped down into her milky cleavage… and at her legs, it was cut up the front, showing some more pale skin at her thighs. More good choices from her, I continued to be impressed. Very tasteful… but plenty of sex appeal. There is that mix of conservative and “something else” showing up in her profile once again.
Dinner was perfect. She was easy to talk to and we fell into it easily. As the date bubble formed, we struggled to pay attention to the menu, the servers, and the food.
As we were side by side, I was touching her the whole time. I did the usual thing where I wrap both hands around her bicep… and slide my fingers up under her arm to more intimate territory. And then, my other hand on the skin of her leg below the hem of her dress. She took all the touch very well.
This is another example of how I can use dinner dates as the first date, and get way more physical (even while eating), than some guys can while having drinks at a bar. I would “lean in” (Rivelino!!!!) across her shoulder, talk into her ear, and she would lean in too… the bubble increasingly tight around us.
At dinner I could tell she liked me…and wanted to reel me in. She was working for my attention… and NOT because I was trying to make that happen, but because that is a BYPRODUCT of a good connection.
In the way of some sexualized bait for me… she mentioned being interested in “pole dancing.”
So that is funny, right? All this talk about her being high class.
We make jokes in America about a girl being “on the pole,” and for a man like me… that is never a good thing. But this isn’t typical stripper-trash pole talk. She is a “good girl,” from a conservative family, top of her class… doing “sexy exercise” on the pole at a dance studio. I tried to explain my amusement somewhat… without talking too much about how disgusting I think strippers are. “Stripper game”… is not my thing.
I am not impressed at her choice of exercise… but I think it’s cute that she was using it to bait me. She thinks it’s sexy… and she wanted me to see that too.
As the date wrapped up… it felt very good to me… and I had some signs it was time to take this girl home…
She mentioned that she had been approached on the street three times recently… in the last three weeks. I made a comment about ovulation, and said that if she is getting that kind of attention in the same day or so, it could be ovulation. But over three weeks… probably not. So then… toward the end of the date… she did this thing where she gave me “doggy dinner bowl eyes” and then “shivered,” like she was cold, but more “enjoyable” than that. I asked if she was okay… she said, “it’s all your touching… maybe I am ovulating.”
That was a very big come-on. It was time to try to take this girl home.
We wrapped up dinner and I asked if she wanted to come back and “meet my cats?” She said “sure.” Five minutes later we were back in my house.
I didn’t even give her the tour… we sat in the kitchen briefly, I made her some tea, the cats spilled around us like charming ghosts… and I kissed her.
And right away she said…
HER: We can’t have sex tonight
We chatted about that comment… I can’t remember what I said, but I wasn’t overly logical nor was I over-eager about the sex. I was calm.
We kissed some more… not the best kissing, not at all… but lots of potential in her general energy. I grabbed her by the wrist and took her to my room. Besides her little talk about “no sex,” there was zero LMR (not at first) as I pushed her back onto the bed. She was ready for a serious makeout, if not more.
And as soon as I laid her down, she said something interesting…
HER: Ouu… you’re experienced
This ^ came out of her mouth like a sexy-slow “purr” from a perfectly stimulated cat. No girl has ever told me I was “experienced” as I was first beginning to sex her up.
She likes “the chase” in bed. She said, “no don’t!” a couple of times… and at such random moments that the words were just props to the vibe as she delivered them. Yet it was easy to take her clothes off… I had I had her sit on top of me, and used that opportunity to lift her dress over her head. Perfect compliance from her for all that.
And as I got her dress off she said something about how she “wore the wrong underwear”… and that they were “maybe too sexy for me.” That was meant to be almost sexually dominant (I think), but she was only half-confident with the line. It’s true, she was wearing a hot little combination of bra and panties… but I am rarely if ever turned on by lingerie. I want skin. I laughed at her and flipped her onto her back… biting at her and working to raise our collective temperature.
But like her little comment about her underwear… so many times that night this girl would surprise me. She is “conservative” on the outside… but has more than that to offer. Her confidence isn’t complete… but she does see herself as bold much of the time.
I took her bra off, was working my mouth down toward her boobs and she told me to bite her nipples. She has a sensitive body and she made wonderful noises for me. And much like when I fucked Miss Surprise in Tokyo… she had that “sex smell” coming off of her body… particularly around her nipples and the back of her neck. That smell is so hot for me. I was very turned on at this point.
I mention she likes being chased in bed… there were more strong signs of that. She did something I’ve seen before, but not quite to this degree: She wants to be “forced.”
At the level of kissing, she would turn her head back and forth and make me pin her down and force my mouth over hers. This was not resistance… this was what she wants… this is what arouses her. I’ve seen that before, many times, but not as extreme as with this girl. This girl would really thrash around as I tried to find her mouth. She would kiss me back… and with passion… but only after I could successfully dominate her. That’s what she wants. She did this over and over.
Even as she and I enacted her little “rape fantasy,” I would have her arms pinned down… and she would make that very easy for me. Both of her hands were easy to hold down with just one of mine… All the resistance was a show. More “props” for the flavor of sexual mood she likes.
I like that stuff too, very much. I love how she made me “take her.” It was sexy. She is sexy.
At then she almost randomly asked me about my “health report.” She wanted to know if I had been tested recently (even if that wasn’t exactly how she said it). I didn’t answer directly, just brushed it aside.
The “no sex tonight” comment she made in my kitchen… and the questions about me being tested for STDs as we fooled around in my bed… all that is what Krauser would call hindbrain/forebrain conflict. She wanted to fuck me… but she is a “good girl” (at some level), and like most “good girls,” she has plenty of reasons to say “no.” She comes from a “delayed gratification culture”… she may not see me as a boyfriend… but she has some mild “K” like qualities…
I tempted her further… I rolled her up in a ball and nibbled at her from behind… biting the skin near the edges of her panties, and up between her thighs. She was squirming… she said she had to go.
And she said she knew she was “getting out of control.” She looked desperate as she said it… as her hindbrain was starting to win the battle for her “virtue,” and she was getting closer to getting fucked. Once more I heard her say… “I have to go.”
There was some question in her eyes… she was looking for me to lead. And I suppose I could have fucked her… but I didn’t push it. I even told her it might be a mistake on my part… but that I wasn’t going to be over eager. I told her I was sure she could tell I was more than prepared to fuck her… and she agreed and flashed me big eyes full of attraction.
I kept at it… but in the end… she started moving faster… the LMR feeling got real… she was ready to leave. I made her go slow… I told her she could leave whenever she wanted… but she that I didn’t want to see her run.
We stood up and she put her clothes back on. As we left the bedroom she calmed down and the date was peaceful and civilized again.
I told her to call herself a car and she did. She walked down the steps from my apartment to the street and she never glanced back (-1 point for her for that). She was gone. Confident and fast.
I liked her. I still like her.
No message from her that night.
The next day, before I could say anything to her, she send me this…
"Hi – I had a great time… but do you mind doing me a favor and show me some sort of health proof so I don't keep thinking about it"
— Girl from last night
She sent that this AM, after we had our 1st date last night. No sex, but had her in her panties in my bed.
— Nash (@DaysOfGame_com) March 24, 2018
Hmmmmm. Strange request.
This is what I’m doing:
I made an appointment to get tested. I’m framing this in my mind that the STD check up is for me. I’m owning that. I am getting tested for me. If I never see her again, fine… but I will have had another check up and that is good for me to know my status and to keep “my house” in order.
But most certainly, yes, I want to fuck her.
I teased her in response saying, “How do I feel safe and reassured about you?” And she “lol’d” and said that she would get tested too. After that, this is what I said to her:
NASH: We could have a date and get tested together… but that is too weird for me.
NASH: Getting tested is smart… I’ll do that on my own.
NASH: And let’s you and I have a “normal date” next week…
NASH: Maybe Wednesday??
With girls… is it always “maybe” until your cock is buried inside her.
I’m not sure that I actually need to get tested to fuck this girl… but I will anyways. Maybe all this is a mistake. A wild goose hunt…
I don’t know.
I’m excited about daygame right now. I can’t wait to get out on the street today. I might have a date with another new girl tonight (“maybe”). I messaged a new lead from yesterday… we’ll see if she responds.
Lots of opportunity out there, fellas. Girls…so interesting. I hope I have the chance to fuck this one. And if not her… if the Daygame Gods be generous… than some other tasty little thing.
truly beautiful, yeah.
excellent field report.
I also find for some reason I keep on meeting the same type of girls. In a city of 4 million people, I seem to end up with about 30% bisexual girls who have a GF, a lot of history students, and aspiring actresses.
I almost never meet a girl that I cold approach and find out she is a manager or a shopkeeper or a nurse or an accountant or whatever.
AND, most importantly, the girls I end up cold approaching are the type I like, and I don’t know how I can tell, it’s not like a history student is walking around with 1800 clothing or something like that.
I just feel that girl is interesting and I approach her.
Or maybe because I like them, the approach ends up being better so I get more favorable reactions from those girls?
Maybe Nash that your sub-communication too when you meet a girl from the type you like makes the interaction go so well that you end up going on dates with them, while girls who aren’t totally your type, something about your behavior will be off to them and will push them away.
>> AND, most importantly, the girls I end up cold approaching are the type I like, and I don’t know how I can tell, it’s not like a history student is walking around with 1800 clothing or something like that.
Yeah… this is exactly how I feel. Over and over… I find “my type.”
I like my type… so that is a good thing. Interesting.
“Related to my last post… dancing is an area where I have some VALUE to offer. Some guys will argue that everyone girls like value. Those guys are right.”
One of my favorite Krauser posts is “Reveal vs Restructure” https://krauserpua.com/2016/04/30/reveal-vs-restructure/ because it explains so much about the superficial divides in the community.
Guys who have to learn to build value AND learn to deliver value have a much harder go than guys who mostly have to learn how to deliver value. Krauser said he had to learn how to do both, and that’s what made his game journey so hard.
In some ways my life has been much easier. Although I’ve faced many challenges, from an early age I’ve had reasonably high value. When I was in school that was mostly about sport (to teenage and many college girls, looks, vibe, and status are all). Later, it was about sport, job, hobbies. Learning game starting with The Game helped me with value delivery, to be sure. It helped me tweak a lot of things.
Guys who have the fundamentals in place are going to have very different experiences than guys who don’t. The older a guy is when he realizes this, the harder it will be for him.
>> One of my favorite Krauser posts is “Reveal vs Restructure” https://krauserpua.com/2016/04/30/reveal-vs-restructure/ because it explains so much about the superficial divides in the community.
^ Good addition, thanks.
>> Guys who have to learn to build value AND learn to deliver value have a much harder go than guys who mostly have to learn how to deliver value.
My buddy Runner in NYC has extremely high value… and he can show value via NIGHT GAME… but is working on “relaxing” in DAYGAME enough that he can deliver his value there.
He is a great example of what you’re talking about. He actually has to hide his value… so he’s doesn’t show too much “boyfriend material” in set.
>> In some ways my life has been much easier. Although I’ve faced many challenges, from an early age I’ve had reasonably high value.
I know you wrote a great post about this… I think THIS IS IT:
>> Guys who have the fundamentals in place are going to have very different experiences than guys who don’t. The older a guy is when he realizes this, the harder it will be for him.
Yeah… and this is a GREAT thing about the small % of guys that stick with it and rebuild themselves… the bait of “fresh pussy” actually leads us to being better men.
That is definitely true for me.
I know you wrote a great post about this… I think THIS IS IT:
Good spotting, man! I should’ve looked back and found it for myself.
I know older guys, like 40+, who finally figure out the fundamentals. Better late than never, but boy that hurts.
The only thing that hurts more is never learning them at all.
I think guys that get into this… even as late as I did (35 when I found game) have tremendous opportunity. At 45, I am shocked at where I am now… infinitely cooler and more successful than I was mid-30s.
Yes… I wish I could have found this stuff when I was 20. But with that said…
My THEORETICAL PEAK was long ago… perhaps. But my ACTUAL PEAK (in terms of output and “greatness”) hasn’t happened yet… I’m sure of that.
The difference is POTENTIAL.
Maybe I had more “maximum upside potential” 10+ years ago, but I NEVER UTILIZED IT. Now, I know I am USING MY CURRENT POTENTIAL much more than any other time in my life… I want to advance further toward that potential… narrow the gap between my current output and my potential.
That is the space for greatness for most men… approaching whatever that man’s potential is today. Fuck “could have/should have.” What is our potential NOW? How do we increase that potential (=INVEST) going FORWARD? How we do maximize output (=WORK) up to that potential TODAY???
With that said… HERE’S TO BEING GREAT MEN in 2018. Yes to that.
My best days are yet to come… in business and with girls… I’m sure of it.
Amazing comment. Inspires me.
I’m so glad I started working on this at 28. The fact that you made so much progress between 43 and 45 makes me think I need to hustle NOW and get as good as I can be so I can take full advantage of my peak SMV years of my mid-30s.
From the Krauser article The Red Quest posted above:
>> So, that’s why the fChump is rather self-obsessed during his early years and then extremely proud of his Hero’s Player’s Journey once he’s started banging hotties. The tChad might think those lay reports and +1 tweets are just ego validation. Yes, they are. He just doesn’t realise how vindicating it feels to finally get your leg over the rim of the barrel and roll onto solid ground, forever free of the crabs snapping their claws below you.
“because it explains so much about the superficial divides in the community.”
— The Red Quest
Yeah. The chump/chad split explains a lot of what is going on.
And while Chad might be well defined at some level… Chump is a spectrum… a wide, “grey” spectrum of “not quite there” (or “not even close”) I know so many guys in that category… compared to Chad, almost everyone I know is more Chump… I say that with familiarity and love/respect for other guys trying to escape the gravity of Chump-status.
>> to finally get your leg over the rim of the barrel and roll onto solid ground, forever free of the crabs snapping their claws below you.
That whole piece hurts for me to read… as I went through all that.
Most of it wasn’t that bad at the time… I always felt like I was improving, and I was, and I had NO IDEA how far I had to go (or I would have felt hopeless).
But two summers ago… with Yohami telling me to “stop the madness,”… I was drowning in self doubt… I was doing the work, but getting nowhere… I get a stomach ache even thinking about that summer. I was so dedicated. And I was getting nothing. Jul and August were brutal.
I still have a ridiculously long way to go… but I “have my leg over” and I know I can produce results.
When I have a long streak of bad results, I still wonder if I’ve finally arrive at “too old” and “missed my window,” and then the Daygame Gods give me a break I then I’m fine again…
UPS AND DOWNS
UPS AND DOWNS
UPS AND DOWNS
UPS AND DOWNS
UPS AND DOWNS
Fucking A… this game. Amazing.
Beautiful report, Nash, as always. Congratulations!
STD checks are weird. I feel like they never give you a satisfying result. Most STDs can’t be accurately tested for, and most places won’t do it unless you have symptoms. If a girl ever asks me, I just tell her I’m clean. I usually get checked every six months or so (the free public health clinic in the city does it for $25).
By the way, did I ever tell you about the time I got a girl’s number at the STD clinic? Like most of my daygame numbers, it never panned out, but it would have been a great story for us to meet up and figure out why we were both there. I still swipe across her on Tinder occasionally, and I saw her at a bar a couple weeks ago.
>> No girl has ever told me I was “experienced” as I was first beginning to sex her up.
Scene: right before I lost my virginity, the girl whose neck I was kissing in the hostel shower, moaning in pleasure:
“I bet you do this to all the girls.”
I can’t even remember what I responded, but it was one of the best validation moments of all time. Funnily enough, I haven’t heard it much since. Maybe I’ve gotten worse ;-)
>> There was some question in her eyes… she was looking for me to lead. And I suppose I could have fucked her… but I didn’t push it.
Are you worried about never seeing this girl again? I’ve probably lost 5-8 girls to first date LMR and then never seen them again. In this city, I’m starting to realize that if I don’t fuck a girl on the first date after bringing her back to the house, she disappears. So I either run Blackdragon 2-date game (which I still don’t think works very well in SF) or I try to close on the first date.
>> By the way, did I ever tell you about the time I got a girl’s number at the STD clinic?
One of the girls that works at the clinic I got tested at this week is… exactly my type. I remember her from last year when I got tested. My brain was working overtime wondering how to get her number… but… so many girls on the street… easier to start there.
>> “I bet you do this to all the girls.”
That ^ is recognition of something… sometimes I think it’s validating and other times I think the girl us trying to disqualify me… but if she is saying that while she’s in the shower with you… sounds like she’s well into it.
Two girls in the last month said “do you talk to girls on the street all the time.” I think that is 1/2 complement, 1/2 them looking for a reason to dismiss me.
>> Are you worried about never seeing this girl again? I’ve probably lost 5-8 girls to first date LMR and then never seen them again. In this city, I’m starting to realize that if I don’t fuck a girl on the first date after bringing her back to the house, she disappears.
Yeah… I was a little concerned about that. And then the next day when she asked again about me getting tested, I assumed she would come out again. And then… she is a “bad texter,” so all week long I wasn’t sure if our second date was on…
…but she showed up last night. No notch. Pretty good date. I like her and I definitely want to see her again.
>> I’m starting to realize that if I don’t fuck a girl on the first date after bringing her back to the house, she disappears.
I feel the same way, man… but I think this is bad science on our part.
There are 10000000000 reasons why we might not see a girl again. I am currently more sold on the idea that I won’t see her again if I OVER-ESCALATE and/or don’t get her aroused enough. I bet that makes me lose more girls than “under escalating.”
I think I am doing plenty of escalation, but need to step up my seduction. It’s not about “pushing,” but I am pushing plenty hard enough. I think I need to look for opportunities to be “more effective” not just do “more.”
So I’m going to give you huge props for not pushing too hard for the notch, but also not giving up.
A lot of guys give up at the first sign of LMR, and cost themselves a lot of lays that way. They’re overly scared of catching a felony.
As a professional salesman I can tell you that sometimes you just have to close people a solid 5 or 6 times before they finally hand you that credit card.
“Humans aren’t rational creatures; we’re rationalizing creatures that want to seem reasonable to ourselves.” – Elliot Aronson.
Sometimes LMR is nothing more than a girl needing an acceptable justification for doing what she wants to do.
Isolation can often take care of a lot of that – removing social pressure – but there are certain mores that will require a bit more work. You can’t be scared of that.
On the other hand, it’s always, always better to play it safe. If you’re getting enough resistance it’s better to not push it too hard. One bad night can ruin your life, you know?
I had this one lady in a hotel room once. We were both naked except for her panties, we’re making out, and she says to me, “You know we aren’t having sex tonight.”
I laughed – because we’re both naked and making out in a bed, like, what the fuck else are we doing tonight? – and said, “When I want to, we will.”
Maybe ten minutes later I had her panties off, and we had sex maybe 4 or 5 times that night.
Great story, man!
>> “Humans aren’t rational creatures; we’re rationalizing creatures that want to seem reasonable to ourselves.” – Elliot Aronson.
>> “When I want to, we will.”
Also ^ a great line. I like that.
>> On the other hand, it’s always, always better to play it safe. If you’re getting enough resistance it’s better to not push it too hard. One bad night can ruin your life, you know?
Had her out again last night… she felt more like she was “playing a game” with me. I got her back in my bed, but her protests seemed more serious and she wasn’t as “giving.” Got her panties off by not her dress and she kept getting up and trying to leave… we “danced” like that for an hour… I would escalate, and then give her room to do what she wanted… then pin her down again… back/forth.
She still makes me force her to kiss her. And some of that is very hot… and some of it isn’t.
She told me I was “going too fast.” And “I’m scared.” But there is a playfulness in her eyes…. I called it out and she agreed. She is a good actress when she says “no.” I told her I’m happy to blow off her “soft nos” but I don’t know her well enough to push past those hard “nos.”
I think it’s a game. I assume if she comes over one more time, I can take it much further… she knows what to expect… so if she is still coming over… that is it’s own communication.
I am a little frustrated… but I still like her.
Nash, your blog is a great corner of the internet.
I love the community here and the realness in your posts and in what people say.
Like you said about the crab mentality, it’s not here. I feel everyone is trying to help everyone, so we all improve and become the high value men we are capable of being.
I, for one, am grateful for your posts and for you providing this space. I am also grateful to Yohami, he generously shares the truth while really he doesn’t have to.
“May a squadron of beautiful vaginas find their way to your crotch by days end.”
Hey Nash, can you post more about how you did the actual day approach? What made this one work out of 17 total?
As far as the STD check goes, I’d just make it easy for her to say yes. I had that asked several times, and every time I just got tested and told the girl that I was fine – which was true – and we proceeded to sex after that. It’s an easy quest. :)
>> Hey Nash, can you post more about how you did the actual day approach? What made this one work out of 17 total?
Ummm… I don’t know. She is “my type,” high-end Asian girl… but that is mostly what I open… girls like that reject me all the time.
She said something about noticing me when I first past her… so there may have been an IOI there… but that wasn’t my focus as I approached.
I am a big fan of VOLUME. So I think a part of this is finding girls, meeting them… and then testing for compatibility, interest and availability.
To me 17 GIRLS is the thing to focus on… more chances to win, AND, being more warmed up (although this girl was when I was just barely warming up).
THIS ONE worked… because I opened her, I did well in set, I am probably something like a type that she likes, she isn’t in a relationship, she wasn’t having a bad day…
I think it’s like ^ that. CHANCE… plus some skill.
Krauser is emphasizing INTERESTED and AVAILABLE… and I like those factor. Is she interested? Is she available? That will influence your results greatly.
I know I am getting better… but I think she/I are a good fit.
The SKILL is more of a factor in getting her on the date, having a good date, getting her to come home, getting her naked, getting her on a second date…
For the record… she is on her way over here… right now… for date number 2.
May the Daygame Gods be generous. May we all be entertained.
“she is on her way over here… right now”
It was an okay date. If it was a first date, I would have given it a 7+. Since it was the second date…and she played a bunch of games in bed… no progress… I’d give it 6+.
We went a week without seeing each other… so I think we lost some momentum.
I’m going to try to see her again in the next couple of days… see if I can get us over the “hump” and get her to surrender.
I was frustrated after she left… but I think some of that is impatience and immaturity on my part.
“And what is the ‘look’ I am attracted to? The look is… that she is conservative.”
amen to that.
back when i was daygaming with DG, he said that i approached girls that looked like they were going to church.
another daygamer said i talked to girls who looked like they were going to church.
K girls for me, oh yeah!
the night gamers can have all the tattooed whores and sluts, oh yeah!
>> i approached girls that looked like they were going to church.
Yeah. That would get me.
I like miniskirts and thigh-high boots too… I open those girls. But any sign of “trashy” and I’m out.
Interesting side point:
How many “professional girls” have you picked up?? I think that says a lot about our tastes as men.
I have several wings that have ended up on dates with “escorts” or whatever. A good friend of mine had an idate w/ a girl like that… and she moved things to “business” soon after they sat down.
I can mostly say that I NEVER end up talking with “pros.” The girls I like mostly can’t be mistaken for “working girls,” because they are too conservative.
In Tokyo, I picked up a “hostess girl.” She gets paid to “have drinks” with Japanese business men. She did NOT look like the type. She was simple and childish and extremely nervous with me… she told me about her job almost by accident. She was not hustling me… but I immediately lost interest. Ended the date and moved on.
And then last week… YoungGuns and I were out. And a very hot Asian girl gave us an “IOI.” I assumed it was for me, so I went after her. She was “cold,” but let me do my thing… but she asked if I “left my friend back there” to talk to her. I said he’d be alright. And then… mid-set, she asked, “Do you know the Gold Club?” (The “nicest” stripclub in my city). I said, yeah… also losing interest immediately. She said, “My name is Tiffany, I work Friday nights, come see me some time.” I told her “that’s not my thing, but have a nice night” and ejected. And then… when I got back to my wing and told him about the Gold Club… he realized she had given him a lap dance the night before (he had just been there). So the “IOI” was her recognizing a customer… him. I mistook it for interest… in me.
No pros for me. I want to do “bad” things with “good” girls.
“he had just been there”
“I want to do ‘bad’ things with ‘good’ girls.”
YESSS. that’s the hottest thing ever.
“How many ‘professional girls’ have you picked up?? I think that says a lot about our tastes as men.”
none, in 3,000 approaches.
[…] and i agree, we like the “good girls” doing “bad […]