Perfected Himself Through Loneliness

Read this today:

Classical literature was full of heroes—the vast majority of them were men—who were heroic because they were alone. The quest narrative was one in which a man whittled away from himself all societal bonds and then, having perfected himself through loneliness, returned triumphant to society. Society was still there waiting for him because it had been tended by women, who were never alone.

I like this, as it pertains to where I am in daygame… which is Newbie Hell.

When I started daygaming, I usually went with my wing. When I went to Japan, I had to learn to run game on my own, and I loved it. But there I was, out on the streets, alone. I run almost all my sets alone now.

And then the sets start to kick your ass. It’s not like I don’t enjoy them, I do, yesterday was fucking cool (unproductive, but great), talking to girls is cool. But the sets can be rough. And then numbers that lead to silence, that’s even rougher. All that work for a number that is nothing more than dead-air. Worse than dead-air… dead-air with expectations.

Going back to the quote, I’m getting “whittled” down. The discipline is cleaning me up, in that I show up, and deliver, over and over, even when I’m not getting “paid.” Set after set, pounding me into something better, something more useful, to myself and women. I have me. And I know I’m solid. When that is very fucking clear in my eyes… my sets will get better. This is how it goes.

Please, Baby Jesus, let this transformation happen soon!

This is all classic mythology… you hear the call (maybe in your balls), but you don’t want to go. It sounds hard — and it will be. That’s most guys, they ignore the call, play video games and jerk off instead. But some men begin the quest. And they leave comfort to find something bigger, to become bigger men, better men. Helpers appear, but it’s mostly him. Alone, set after set. Leaving behind “societal bonds,” alone on the street, working his craft. No one holds your hand on the sidewalk.

Newbie Hell, is that space somewhere after you’ve accepted the quest, but before you’ve found the grail. That’s where I am. 100+ sets into this particular quest. (I’m not going to bother counting them until I get laid… damn, it’s gonna be a lot of sets!).

I’m trying to make some sense out of where I am right now… and this frame is helping.

Here are the sets.

1. Out on Memorial Day. I don’t like weekends… far fewer single girls, in my experience. This was a holiday Monday, so it was like a weekend. I did 1 set in a bit over an hour. She was a slightly better than average looking Asian girl. Blew me out. Fine.

Spotted a guy out running sets, and watched him for a bit. After he was done, I introduced myself… nice guy. I almost never see anyone else out. I think most guys run weekend game, and I don’t see them, as I’m out during the week.

Next day was a Tuesday… I was excited, and sets where everywhere.

2. Little Asian girl, was confused as to what was going on, but stood there. I eventually told her I was hitting on her, to make it explicit. Huge smile, but she was mostly just confused by the whole thing. Some girls do feel naïve to me. I let her go.

3. Beautiful, fancy Asian girl. She was in the middle of about 10 people, moving down the sidewalk in one big worker-bee blob of strangers. I threaded my way in there, almost just for practice in forcing my way into a group like that. Had to side stop, as I couldn’t get in front of her. She was precious… so beautiful. Wow. Great smile, but couldn’t stop her. Beautiful.

4. 30 secs after #3, I met an Iraqi programmer girl. Ha… daygame, so random! Stopped her, nice chat. Wasn’t really that into her, but tried to close, asked her if she wanted a drink w/ me sometime. “No thank you,” she said. Fine and fine.

5. Tiny, sunglasses… those are the notes I took down. I’m guessing she’s Asian, but I can’t remember this one. Damn, I love Asian girls.

6. Beautiful Asian girl, blue coat, great smile. She barely stopped, but her smile bloomed across her face as I opened her. She was going to dinner. Tried to get her to talk, but it didn’t really happen. She was my favorite of the day. I want to date that girl.

7. Sets were coming super fast at this point… and now a little Asian girl, with big headphones, arms crossed, great legs and a skirt. Big smile, but said she had a BF right away.

8. Lovely little white girl, with a proud pony tail and great confident walk. Turned out to be Russian — she didn’t tell me that, but it was the accent, and even more so, that calm, strong vibe Russian girls have. She didn’t understand what was going on, and wasn’t completely stopped. Then she got it, and “I’m not interested,” and calmly walked away. Wow… really beautiful one. She was right… I’m not ready for her. Not yet.

9. This girl… wow! I opened her, in part, just because she was so hot, so put together, I was challenging myself. She was tiny, brown skin, beautiful. I’m guessing Latin? Stopped well… and I had nothing to say. I think that was just me freaking out that she was so hot. I remember thinking she didn’t like what was going on when I was in set… but as I think back, I think she was a “maybe” the whole time and I just panicked, ejected too early. Not quite ready for her either.

I got a text and realized I was late for a call. Shit. Took the call, but it lasted an hour… prime daygame time, wasted. I was cold when the call was done.

10. Beautiful Asian girl in the mall. I didn’t open well and she didn’t understand me. When she did, said she wasn’t interested. I don’t blame her, weak set. She thanked me, I split.

Fuck… if I hadn’t done that call, I bet it would have been a 15+ set day… and I was really warming up. Oh, well… more tomorrow.

Viva daygame.