Siren, Pancake and a Week in Daygame
I’ve been back from Japan for a month… I have been dragging my ass on posting my final stats. But I may finally have some stories worth telling. Good. I am missing the action.
Partly I have been allowing myself a more balanced life. Working more. Taking care of my finances. Seeing my friends. I did a trip to southern California for surfing, family and more friends. That’s been part of it.
I have been running game. Some great sets, lots of leads, but can’t get the girls out. Leads and leads… Seems like 2-3 per day is a very reasonable expectation. I feel like I got better in Japan… I have had some bad days (like yesterday), but I feel like I have leveled up since last Fall.
Getting better means many things. More basic tactical skill, yes. But more entitlement. That’s key. More basic “top guy” attitude (credit: Yohami). I expect things to work… So they do.
Except the dates. I haven’t dated anyone except the Siren since I’ve been back. She is juicy, delicious and wonderful. But I have been having some trouble getting new girls into the dating and the sex.
That’s partly why I haven’t written in a while. I think I’m done documenting every single set (even thought I am still taking notes). I think I still want to write about the good sets, the meaningful ones, but not trying to “count approaches” like I have done in the past.
As for Siren, I have been talking about her for a few months now. We’re a very good match. Great chemistry. We’re both really into it.
When I picked her up she felt special, but lots of girls feel special. She was different for two reasons. 1.) Because she and I have worked out. Most girls I meet may be fun in the moment, but they don’t all become leads, let alone lovers. And 2.) Because it is *really* working out between us. Not just some dates and some sex, but some intensity and connection. She’s great.
Of the daygame girls I’ve bedded, she feels the most serious. So serious, she doesn’t feel like a daygame girl at all.
I think daygame gives you access to more girls, but a lot of the sex is one-time only, or short spells. I like how Krauser talks about “Sigma” game, and being an outsider. I know he specifically looks for girls that are outsiders too. This isn’t “social circle game.” I think you end up with an “outsider” position in these girl’s lives much of the time. Which is fine with me. But it helps to explain the hit-and-run theme I seeing in my results.
The Siren, however, is different. She feels like the strong connections I used to have when I was full-on bluepill, AFC “normie.” I think I used to get deeper connection before I discovered game in general. But I also know I was in a time of my life when young people hook up. Young people, in school, or freshly out of college, young professionals, hanging out in big groups socially as single people. Before eveyone couples up. Before all my friends were married.
And my success in that time was “unconscious competence.” I had no fucking idea what I was doing. No way I would go back to those times now, and trade unconscious luck for the very conscious skillset I’ve developed. I am in an infinitely more powerful position now.
I am still new to being in the semi-successful side of the daygame journey. More girls will come, and with then, more deep connections, I’m sure. I’m not even craving that. I love the “one off” nature of daygame, the “in the momentness,” the adventure. What they used to call “fast seduction” in Game 1.0.
With Siren, I am taking a moment to pause. To notice how I feel about her. How the relationship feels more like the start of the “boyfriend/girlfriend” thing I used to do, but now actively avoid. And yet… I do like this girl.
And in some ways I am sure that is a very good thing. I like her, but don’t want to slip into my old bluepill habits. Boring, softer, and weaker means you won’t be able to land and hold onto younger, hotter tighter.
I don’t want a girlfriend, “singular.” I want girlfriends. I want to dance with the Tornadoes.
Keeping all this mind.
A week ago tonight, I took Siren out to a high-end Japanese place (I know I am missing Japanese food as I reenter my California lifestyle). It was a fantastic night.
Right from the start, when we met at my door… It was so on. We had a reservation… otherwise I would have taken her upstairs and fucked her right then.
Instead we stood at the door. Cats circling around our feet as I pinned her long, smooth arms to the wall above her head and teased her with a kiss I wouldn’t quite give her. Inhaling her breath. Then I leaned back. We were on opposite sides of the doorway, behind the closed door to the street, facing each other and smiling. Each of us pretending to be casual in way that neither of us felt.
Dinner was oishii desu and conversation flowed. Same restaurant where I broke up with my LTR (The Tokyo Queen) a little over a year ago. I have been going there more. Took the Heartbreaker in Dec for a (mostly) platonic date. They are starting to know who I am now.
And then back to my home… and crazy intense sex. I don’t think she is very experienced, but she is a very passionate, artistic type, and our chemistry is electric. Exhausting, intoxicating sex.
It wasn’t the sex that night (or again the next morning) that makes me take notice. I think it was the way we are still a little desperate for each other. Not because we have no options, or that it has been a long time since we’ve seen each other, but because we both want it. And even when we sleep, we hold on tight — physically hold each other very tight — so the dream won’t slip away. Romantic… and exhausting.
The next day was Friday. After I said goodbye to her, I tried to daygame. And I had nothing.
I walked around for over an hour and opened exactly two girls. Awkward, creepy-feeling interactions. I had no intent. I would flop a limp approach out in front of the girl. No bueno. Zero gas in the tank. I thought I could fight through it, but I had nothing. I gave up pretty quick.
And then I tried working my leads and couldn’t get any of the fresh ones out.
I have a lot of new leads… many had exchanged messages, but couldn’t get any of them on dates. And the old leads, the ones that responded after I was newly back from Japan, had also faded to dim embers or dead charcoal.
I took the weekend off, surfed again, caught up on more work, and saw even more of my friends.
On Monday I decide to burn all those old leads… Not sure there is anything there to burn, but time to turn my back on them.
And here we are, time to start afresh, build a new Tornado from scratch. I have the Siren as a secret cache of pleasure and satisfaction, but I am ready to get “it” going again. I’m up for “it.” I miss “it.”
Monday I hit the street… Fun day. 12 girls, but no leads. That hadn’t happened in a while.
And yet I love the meritocracy of daygame. I know if I work, barring a curse from the Daygame Gods… I’ll reap rewards roughly in line with my efforts. That is fair. There is luck and art to this, but it is still a merit based game. I am a hard worker. I like merit-based opportunities.
Monday night… Another date with Siren. Much more calm, more “every day” this time. She wasn’t in a great mood, and I adjusted my expectations, deescalated, leaned back.
She told a story about a musical collaborator of hers, some guy… that is trying to fuck her. She didn’t say that, but men like us know the score. There was a flicker of irritation as she first brought him up. I have made girls feel like that before, I probably still do, so I felt like I knew what the guy was up to… just from that flash in her face. He is no hero to her. I called him her “best friend” and we exchanged knowing looks.
Dinner, a drink, some live music at a cafe, my house. My desert was between her milky thighs. And more close-sleep, side by side, cats curled on the covers.
In the morning… The Siren sucked my cock and I came in her pretty mouth. It was the first time she had ever brought a man off in her mouth. And while Yohami will doubt that, the excitement was proof this was a first for her. She was almost inappropriately excited, hopping around with my come in her mouth, celebrating even before she swallowed my kids down into her smooth belly.
Ha. Another great experience. For both of us. I love these real, odd moments with girls. You can’t make this stuff up.
She left that morning, letting herself out after we’d showered and shared my toothbrush again.
I took the day off from game, expecting the same post-sex lack of intent I’d had the previous Friday… But it wasn’t the same. I didn’t run game, but I felt like I could have gamed that day despite two orgasms in the preceding 24 hours.
As I think of it now, it wasn’t so much the orgasms that drained me as the weight of the heavy emotional bonding and the overall romantic expenditure. That is an interesting distinction, as it see it. It’s the bonding that made it hard to game other girls last week… I think.
And then it was Wednesday, and Pancake and I were meeting up to wing each other and hunt girls in the concrete forest.
Pancake had been on an International trip and I hadn’t seen him in a while. As we caught up, he had a laid-back quality that stood in contrast to what I know about him. Turned out he’d just been laid as well. Pancake’s typical energetic boldness had settled into a more subtle, calmer vibration. He was into it, ready to approach, but was notably less wolfy and intense than other days.
My friend Natural used to date an old-fashioned and very feminine girl. She used to say:
“If you want to keep a man happy… keep his stomach full and his balls empty.”
— Natural’s Ex Girlfriend
I love that line. It feels like an anachronism, but those are excellent “care and feeding” instructions if a girl wants to hold onto a man. While I’m stressing the impact of the emotional bond, empty balls certainly does seem to neutralize some of the potency that could make a man’s hunt more… concentrated.
And Wednesday was a really great day. Sunny. Not too hot. Lots of girls out. So good to be out there. Pancake had a date later that night and I had a meeting, so we met up earlier than usual to get to work. We traded stories and ran off every few minutes to approach.
I can always tell when Pancake spots a girl he likes… his attention in the moment is gone. He drops into singular focus. I usually shut up and pan the surroundings to see if I can spot his prey. All that without looking conspicuous, so I don’t spook her or make her defensive before Pancake’s approach.
He did great on Wednesday. One set I remember very well with a super tall blonde girl I assumed was Russian. Amazing ass. Jesus. It was a long set, and she was loving him. Very happy girl… stroking that long blonde hair the whole time. She turned out to be Dutch.
And then he had a 15 minute set with a cute, young British girl… she was traveling… alone. Last night in the city. Staying by herself in a hotel. If you think that sounds like a perfect set up for some “adventure sex,” I’d agree.
He did get the Brit out that night… After the date with an Asian girl he already had scheduled. Two dates in one night. Not bad, Pancake. Looking good, man.
And I was feeling pretty laid back as well that day. Chatty, and enjoying what Krauser would call the “Rat Pack” vibe.
I had some great interactions. Talked to 5 girls. Took 4 numbers. The kind of day that makes you think you’re better than you really are. Makes you think daygame is “easy,” and we know daygame is certainly not easy.
Two girls stand out:
The first was bubbly, feminine, sweet 21 year old girl. Popped open with excitement. She was chatty and charming. I have been watching Bad Boy’s daygame videos (which are pretty terrible), and he does some demo sets where the girls are way too responsive, beyond “yes” girls. I’m not sure if they are all fake, but some of them certainly don’t seem real. This girl reminded me of those sets. Like I paid her to make me look good… she was that easy.
I took her Line contact and strolled back to Pancake. I told him that was the kind of set I wish for all daygamers, myself included. Adorable little girl. Fun to talk with her. Great state booster. I have messaged her and we’re working on a date.
And then a bit later, there was a very tough looking Chinese girl. Not super pretty at all, but something about her really got my attention. Pancake was surprised that I was into her, I think he would have passed on this one. Black flat-brimmed hat, on backwards. Long, nice black hair down past her shoulders (probably the only really feminine thing about her). Black leather jacket. White tshirt, jeans, and black combat boots.
Stopped her and told her I thought she was attractive but that she looked “tough.” She gave me a feminine eye sparkle and then snapped back into her butch energy. At one point she said some people ask her if she’s lesbian, I’m not surprised. That’s not my thing, but I liked all this on her.
I asked if she had a BF and she said yes… And I said I could tell from the hickie on her neckline that was almost gone, faded to a brownish yellow, and still advertising that she is gets sucked on sometimes… the advertising worked on me. Not as a warning, but as an enticement. I pointed out the hickie to her and she smiled.
So we stood there and the vibe was hot. Very hot. She was telling me that the BF was serious, but the sexual tension between she and I kept rising. I told her I understand that she is in a relationship but that I still wanted to see her. I looked her up and down and told her that the chemistry between us was strong… And she agreed. Fucking hot.
I took her number. Even thinking about that moment makes me want to fuck that girl. It was a strong connection.
I messaged her, and heard nothing back. Good for her. I hope she and the BF are happy… perhaps installing new hickies as we read this.
And as an aside: Unreal how many girls I’ve met with BFs since I’ve been back. So many. Sometimes they tell me right away. Other times, they smile and blush and flirt… and don’t say anything until I go to take their contact info. And several others, several, don’t say they have a BF until I message them a few times and ask them out.
These days… I pretty much assume every girl has a BF… and that it mostly doesn’t matter. She may not fuck me. But the BF may have little to do with that.
So… it was a good week for this daygamer. Some good work on the sidewalk. Four new leads to help me bury the unresponsive ones from the last few weeks. Maybe we’ll get a date or two… and have some new action to revel in and to write about.
We’ll see. My thanks to Pancake.
You had a killer day that day. It’s true that my vibe was different, but I went back and listened to my audio from that day and my sets were too friendly, too high-energy. The 15-minute set with the British girl was too joke-y, almost like I just wanted to be her friend. And that’s how she left the date as well. I was given a layup and I failed. One drink, and “I’m knackered, I think I’m going to head back to my hotel”. That stung. I don’t like failing.
So I read your feedback that night. And I sent my daygame texts to Yohami. He gave me some REALLY interesting stuff. He thinks I need to tone down the after-text details. He thinks the “This must be [girl’s name] with the [attribute], nice to meet you. – Pancake” is too invested, too beta. After some back and forth, what I’m going with now is more simple: just “hey [cheeky nickname], it’s Pancake”.
Wanted to practice more and went out with Justin today on a whim. Saturdays suck for talent, but opened six girls, got two numbers. My usual 1/3 ratio, but the sets were WAY better. I slowed down, was more masculine, more pauses, more confident. And nearly ALL the girls reacted in a positive way to that. I even opened a girl who said another PUA had opened her 2 minutes before. I laughed and said “How’d he do?” and got her number, and she’s already replied. A new milestone for me.
I feel bad that I always hijack your comments to talk about my struggles. Should I just start a blog?
Do start one. I have to start one too.
>> sent my daygame texts to Yohami. He gave me some REALLY interesting stuff.
Again, very cool of you Yohami to guide us along. You’re making a big difference to me… Pancake too, it seems.
>> the sets were WAY better. I slowed down, was more masculine, more pauses, more confident
Yeah. I think as you slow down… you’re going to get girls in just the right mood. I’ve been telling Pancake he’s ready for an alpha version of “daddy” game. Not daddy as in older, but daddy as in calm, dominant energy.
>> I laughed and said “How’d he do?” and got her number, and she’s already replied. A new milestone for me.
Ha. I love this stuff. I’ve seen that kind of thing before… Sinn tells a story about how some guy opened a girl, and then some other dude jumped in, so he went next and said, “I want to hit on your too!” Something like that. It can work. It is ONLY about “how she feels.”
>> I feel bad that I always hijack your comments to talk about my struggles. Should I just start a blog?
Yeah. Feel free to talk here, man. We have a good conversation going, but yeah… blog if you’re ready. I’ll read it.
“blog if you’re ready. I’ll read it.”
i’ll read it too.
I’m a bit worried that committing to a blog will devolve my life into full-addict status. I’ll keep commenting for now.
“He thinks the ‘This must be [girl’s name] with the [attribute], nice to meet you. – Pancake’ is too invested, too beta.”
yohami is good for alpha redpill mindset, but his practical dating and texting advice is usually way too in your face.
tom torero and RSD todd are great for redpill mindset **and** for the little mechanics too.
nash, did you see this tweet by tom. i am sure yohami would hate it. your thoughts?
“dating and texting advice is usually way too in your face”
On the contrary, it’s minimalistic and laid back.
“I’ve burnt three good leads in ten days from over-escalating on the 1st date. Bouncing home and pulling trigger too fast from impatience.”
Hmmm, yeah. We can file this into our ongoing discussion about “She is in front of you, so she wants to fuck” vs “expect 3 dates.”
Notice he says “impatience.”
I have been thinking about escalating lately:
— First, a guy doesn’t escalate, doesn’t really know how (drunk hookups only)
— Then a guy escalates mechanically (like how I almost ALWAYS try to kiss on 1st date)
— Then… a guy only escalates when he knows it will work, but in a good way
And that last bit is a “guideline,” not a rule.
I have been thinking about that post I did on “how to escalate.”
This was where I started to synthesize Tyler and Yohami.
“The whole thing is good, but 23:04 “I only escalate when they are going to say yes”. Lead, tease “swing your dick”, see what resonates, then double on that. This is how you get a YES from every girl.”
So… back to Tom…
What if Tom is escalating mechanically? He is kind of saying that. He is saying he knows he is being impatient.
Back to Tyler and RSD…
I am watching the Hotseat, and Tyler is fucking amazing… his infield breakdowns show some very good stuff. And he keeps saying, “see her eyes?! see her eyes?!.” And he only escalates when she has “that look” and he “knows it will work.”
So putting it all together…
— If I try to escalate just to escalate, it may work, it may not… I am making sure she knows I have intent, that I am no LJBF. I am also practicing. I am also “swinging my dick.” But this is small escalation… not trying to pull.
If I tried to pull… I might “flip the car.”
“Fun… up… and then, ‘lets go!’
“You only do that kind of thing if they are feeling amazing
“You don’t do it if they’re not feeling amazing, don’t do it
“You only go for an escalation if they are going to say yes
“I don’t escalate when they’re not going to say yes, why would I do that?”
So I know that big/small escalation… if she is “at the crest of the wave,” I can take her further. The question is, is she at the crest? Am I am to spike her and take her there?
That is ^ what “swing your dick” is all about.
So… it’s not that MUST FUCK FIRST DATE… or MUST WAIT THREE DATES… it’s about getting her in the right mood. When you see that look in her eyes, take her further.
That could be 1 date. That could be 3.
Yohami might be able to “spike her” better, so he can do 1 date… but I might need 3 dates to get her to a place where I can do it.
There is no perfect timeline. I don’t think every girl will fuck first date (but I think both you/I underestimate that option)… but that is not that interesting to me right now.
Now, I want to know:
— How can I swing my dick to make her “spike”
— Can I spot the spike?
— Am I escalating on those spikes?
Maybe Tom is being to mechanical… ignoring all of the above? His impatience is keeping him from doing the dance??
Nash – yes.
Now, I want to know:
— How can I swing my dick to make her “spike”
— Can I spot the spike?
— Am I escalating on those spikes?
“I want to dance with the Tornadoes.” — Nietzschesque. Love it.
“I love these real, odd moments with girls. You can’t make this stuff up.” — just like in the unbearable lightness of being. he tries to documents those moments that you can’t make up.
I love that book… don’t remember him talking about this topic, but I think about that book all the time.
I’ve never done that, but I have always wanted to. Great book.
“What did he look for in them? What attracted him to them? Isn’t making love merely an eternal repetition of the same?
Not at all. There is always the small part that is unimaginable. When he saw a woman in her clothes, he could naturally imagine more or less what she would look like naked, but between the approximation of the idea and the precision of reality there was a small gap of the unimaginable, and it was this hiatus that gave him no rest. And then, the pursuit of the unimaginable does not stop with the revelations of nudity; it goes much further:
How would she behave while undressing? What would she say when he made love to her? How would her sighs sound? How would her face distort at the moment of orgasm?”
–Unbearable Lightness of Being, p.104
“As I think of it now, it wasn’t so much the orgasms that drained me as the weight of the heavy emotional bonding and the overall romantic expenditure. That is an interesting distinction, as it see it. It’s the bonding that made it hard to game other girls last week… I think.”
yes, i think you are right, it’s a good observation.
a hot SDL has the effect of energizing and making you hunt more, with swagger and purpose.
an intense, deep romantic session doesn’t do that. it fills and satiates in a different way.
Interesting. Do you feel like you’re cheating?
I have a feeling like I don’t want to get caught. And I care about her. But I’m not stressing “loyalty” here.
I took a lead 2 weeks ago from the same school she graduated from, also a Chinese girl, also plays piano, same major… and I never msg’d that girl. I thought the might know each other and I don’t want to blow it with Siren.
That was about not getting caught…
I am very happy I am able to see multiple girls. I think all men should try that… if not live that way.
Btw let’s recall something. Couple months ago when you were talking about letting the girls free I told you “you want to own them”, to which you replied “no”.
Then firecracker didn’t want to bond more with you and that made her less attractive to you.
Then Siren is bonding more and you’re feeling awkward off with other girls.
Now imagine Siren doesn’t want to bond anymore or finds a guy she likes more. Or she sees you daygaming another girl on the same corner where you picked her up and calls it off. Or says she wants an exclusive relationship or else. And Firecracker comes back wanting more. And you meet a new girl who is a 10 and is everything you thought you could get in life and more, but she’s having you work a little more, walk that edge more.
When we start in Game it’s all about being able to fuck girls, but it soon turns into Twilight roncom.
>> Then Siren is bonding more and you’re feeling awkward off with other girls.
I think this is a “chemical” thing. We don’t feel those hormones/chemicals as “chemicals,” we feel them as emotions. But I attribute those “feels” to a temporary chemical thing. It fades pretty quickly… those chemicals need contact to bloom.
>> When we start in Game it’s all about being able to fuck girls, but it soon turns into Twilight roncom.
I think we when start out it’s about being able to “fuck girls,” but we really want to “fuck A girl, pls god, any girl, get me laid, get me laid.”
As we get better, it’s “more girls” or the Krauser standard of “younger, hotter, tighter.”
I personally am assuming they will be relatively young, but I want the “more” part. More experiences. Sex will be part of that.
If I loss my relationship with Siren it would hurt. It would be a meaningful loss. She is great… a very special girl. But I am willing to risk that for the overall experience of being the man I want to be… and that man is going to date multiple girls. At least for now.
Yeah. That was mostly about my own personal stories though. Lot’s of meaningful losses and crossroads. The tornado is a proper name.
>> The tornado is a proper name.
Yeah. It’s a fair description.
The “Tornado” is all about chaos and “atmospheric destabilization.” Each girl you add to your life is more “chaos” and when you have enough, you’re in full Tornado. And then… “sex flies out.” I don’t make any claims about being able to make sex happen. I just encourage chaos until.. something sexy happens.
I just got back from a business trip and was gonna just take it easy and watch TV, but now after reading your post and hearing about your daygame adventures and what you have going on with the Siren I am inspired to go out and do a set or two. Thank you for your writing.
Right on, man. Welcome home. Looking fwd to more stories on your blog.
“after reading your post and hearing about your daygame adventures and what you have going on with the Siren I am inspired to go out and do a set or two. Thank you for your writing.”
nash is a big inspiration for me too. he is a man on a mission.