The Sequence + BrownDaygamer’s Vegas Daygame Jaunt
This is a story about BrownDaygamer and his 2021 daygame “jaunt” to the
completely filthy fine city of Las Vegas.
“If I look at the trip from non/daygame lens then I had a great time exploring the casinos, having some good food, living the Vegas experience of a city that never sleeps and winning some $$ from gambling which covered my flight cost. But as for daygame experience, I would not recommend this city.”
It is an interesting case. I want to look at his trip, breakdown his stats, and use his experience as the context to talk about some more advanced concepts in Game.
“Booked my first ever Daygame jaunt to Las Vegas in August.”
Here are the stats he posted from that trip:
“My stats after 5 days…
“In short, Vegas is not a city for daygame.”
(Note the “5 days” – we’ll come back to that.)
Number closes: 14
Responded to text: 3
Instant dates: 2
Date 1: 0
In addition to these stats, he also posted a field report on MidWestDaygame‘s blog. I quote from that post below as I break down what I see.
Brown’s stats give us a chance to think about what kinds of results he got – and why. I am all about “why.” “Why” is where it’s at for getting better.
But first, let’s talk about a concept I am going to call “The Sequence.”
“The Sequence” for pickup and seduction (or “finding a girlfriend”) is something like:
Go out > Approach > Take numbers > Message the girls > Date > Take her someplace private > Escalate > Sex > Relationship
I recently started using this sequence when I talk about Game. It shows the basic steps toward success with women (mapping it out for beginners), and can also help pinpoint where a man is succeeding vs struggling (very useful for intermediate and advanced).
Where is Brown at in The Sequence?
He took 14 numbers… and none of them turned into dates. That is irregular… and it helps to break down where he might improve his Game.
He got out, he approached a bunch of girls (very good), he had a lot success (good sets), and his success slowed down (somewhat) around the “Take Numbers” and “Date” stage of The Sequence. It was a short trip, but in those few days he couldn’t get into the later stages with a girl (other than some idates – more below).
His stats help us see where his “sticking points” might have been on that trip.
“Sticking points” is an old school PUA term that help diagnose a man’s Game. Where a man gets “stuck” shows you his “sticking points” – and where he might get better.
He took a bunch of numbers, but got no dates. Why?
I wasn’t there, but I do know girls and pickup. I have seen 100s of guys go through this process. We can say that numbers that don’t turn into dates are basically weak numbers (generally true). It seems a lot of those numbers where weak.
Brown probably took some numbers that he didn’t need to take. Meaning, the set was decent but she wasn’t that into him or the logistics were impossible. Nothing wrong with that, but he ended up with some weak numbers and a low number:date ratio.
He could probably improve his approach and/or vibe (almost all of us could) to get better numbers. Sure. But what else can we read into this story based on these stats?
SHORT TRIPS ARE “HARD-MODE:”
For most guys that are not
Roy Walker “Chad,” one week is not enough time to reliably get laid.
You want to increase your chances of success: Make the trip longer. You can practice and have fun in less time than that, you might catch a “Yes” girl that can’t wait to get naked, but, 1.), Most guys need time to explore and “warm up” (important). And 2.), Girls often need time to schedule dates, etc.
Going someplace new will give you a burst of energy (which can help your vibe), but jaunts mostly make Game harder. With only 5+ days, Brown didn’t have time to settle down, to warm up, to explore and feel like a “master” in Vegas, or enough time to schedule dates with girls that might have needed more time.
Getting laid on a week-long trip is totally possibly, but short trips are hard mode. You are more likely to be (and appear to be) a “beginner” when you don’t know the place and that will make you less attractive.
For jaunts, lower your expectation, make the trip longer, or both.
IS VEGAS BAD FOR DAYGAME?
“In short, Vegas is not a city for daygame.”
The correct answer is…
Of course you can daygame Vegas.
It was Brown’s first jaunt, some of his numbers look weak, maybe because he was kind of “rushing” through the process in a city that was not a place he knows well. If he had more time, he might FEEL more confident, actually know Vegas better, have better ideas for dates, and more time to warm up, meet more girls, and allow the seductions to unfold.
I acknowledge that Game in Vegas might require some “adjustments:” Most people go to Vegas in groups (for business, for bachelorette parties, to party with friends). Still gameable, but might need some special handling, maybe a more aggressive style for the “City of Sin,” and more skill at setting up “Secret Society” hookups (underrated concept) that her group wouldn’t know about. Same day lay (SDL) is probably a more important skillset in Vegas than most places. All true.
Vegas is definitely gameable, but a fast trip might not give an intermediate guy enough time to genuinely get established and crank up his Game in a believable, attractive way.
Now let’s look at two longer interactions with girls Brown had via some instant dates from daygame.
INSTANT DATE #1:
“I seeded a drink at the bar but she says she doesn’t drink so I seed non-alcoholic drinks in my room. It was hot outside so I said let’s go back to my room, listen to some music, have some drinks and then we come out after an hour to explore rest of the strip. She agreed and we were on our way to my room. As soon as we got off the elevator on the floor, I noticed her being a bit hesitant and having some thoughts in her mind but as soon as we reached my door, she said she can’t come in and needs to go back to her family now. She suggested we can meet later but I never heard from her again.”
Cool. I feel like Brown was reading the girl pretty well. What else can we see in those details?
“I noticed her being a bit hesitant and having some thoughts in her mind.” Yeah. I am going to suggest that SHE noticed something in him. Maybe he was too “in his head,” too self-focused, thinking too much about the pull. She felt that. And then she started to wonder if going up to his room was a good idea. She backed out.
Good for her. It is smart for a girl to double-check that going to some guys room will be a good thing for her (often times it is not).
Brown is a player. He demonstrated that. Girls often like the experience a smooth player can deliver. Girls like sex, players communicate sex might happen, all that. If Brown never pretended to be anything other than a player, why did the girl “suddenly” decide she wasn’t going to have a good experience with him?
I would argue it was because Brown wasn’t really thinking about her experience. And at the crucial moment, she could feel that.
I know girls. And I know guys at Brown’s stage… so this is a good guess. He was trying to get laid. Nothing wrong with wanting to get laid, but…
The best guys are “orchestrating a scene” that feels like a big beautiful win to her. She feels this most easily when it’s true, when you know how to give her that feeling, and when you are setting things up so she feels that all the way to and through the end of the date. This is what high-end Game feels like to a girl – and she can relax into that.
This ability to help a girl feel certain that you are creating a big win for both of you (and certainly her) is one form of “very good Game.” It’s not easy… but it is how some smooth guys approach seduction. Guys like Zan. And Hans Comyn. Increasingly, I think my success is because I am committed to this kind of Game.
INSTANT DATE #2:
“I tried to seed the next drink in my room. She knew what was going on and said ‘don’t try to bring me back to your room, I am not coming.’ I switched the topic and talked about something else. After a few mins, I seeded a drink at another bar on the strip since I felt she wasn’t ready for a pull yet. But then she denied to go to other bar and said she has to go back to her hotel to change and come back out again at night. She suggested we should meet at night, I texted her later but again didn’t hear from her.”
Brown really gets “how to lead” at a logistical level. “Intermediate stuff”: how to move things forward, how to make a plan, to invite her along. He can clearly lead a girl to sex. He is showing some good skill at that stage of the “The Sequence” (which will get him laid… sometimes).
“She knew what was going on and said, ‘Don’t try to bring me back to your room, I am not coming.'”
So here we are again. Brown was clearly leading toward sex. She bounces.
Both of the girls in his examples saw Brown on the approach. They had time to consider Brown’s offer of an idate, and they said yes. They spent a bunch of time with him. But…
They didn’t trust him enough. That is what I see. No dis to Brown, but he hasn’t earned this level of trust yet. When he does… everything gets much, much easier.
Here is what I think is going on:
“You can tell that a lot of times men just want what they want, and they want you to show up in a way that they can get off on the whole situation, and it’s not too much of a turn on for women. Even if they’re running after you and they’re are seducing you… you kind of know if the man is actually really connected and wants something to happen for both of you.”
— Patricia Albere
“Wants something to happen for both of you,” yes. And certainly for her, right? If you get that, a lot of your experiences with women (particularly around “last minute resistance”) will change forever.
Patricia is okay with seduction, but she isn’t “turned on” by the idea of being used as a fuck-doll for his benefit. This is not about “BF/GF” or commitment. It’s about inviting her into a situation where you very clearly have a plan where she can FEEL you are making sure she will have a good experience emotional, psychologically… and yeah, sexually.
You don’t tell the girl all this (although, you can… preferably subtly). Just begin to think of doing all that for her, make that your goal, and then escalate as usual, with all this “how can I make this good for her” running, consciously, in your mind. It is more than that, but that is a good start. Many girls will feel the difference.
Most guys are thinking about their own basic needs, about “the notch,” about the lay report they are going to write later… they are not thinking of her at all. And she can FEEL that lack of attention. As soon as she can feel that, she rejects you. Either “at the elevator” or in bed as you’re trying to make it happen. This is the essence of “last minute resistance.”
I put a lot of attention on this part of “The Sequence” in my own Game. I start thinking about “LMR” (thinking about what she needs) way before I get her to the bedroom. There is a lot you can do to “communicate” to her that you’re going to “take her someplace she wants to go.” That is what seduction is all about.
What does she need to see?
You should be thinking: “I am going to give this girl a great experience, she is going to feel comfortable, and interested, and cared for, I’ll pace where she is at sexually, I’ll read her, I’ll respond to what I see she needs, she’ll feel that response (specifically), we’ll move forward as she is ready… and of course great sex will be part of that. ” Do that… and never go any faster than it takes for her to feel all of that from you.
Pacing the escalation to her feelings is a huge part of what makes a girl lean into you. If she hesitates, and you miss it… she knows you’re not sensitive. She’ll tighten up. She’ll lose trust in the situation. So noticing her hesitation, specifically responding to it… that is part of mastery at this stage. She feels your mastery, she can trust you more, and she lets her “inner fuck” come out.
What is missing for most girls?
“I think that you’ll trust a man’s strength…if he takes you someplace you want to go, then you can surrender to him. A lot of men… are not that attuned to you. They don’t necessarily care how it is for you, they are way too selfish. There is something that just doesn’t happen.”
— Patricia Albere
Almost nobody in seduction talks about this: The kind of seduction where she FEELS that you are very “attuned” to seeing what she is feeling and making sure she has a fantastic time.
Where was the breakdown in the process for Brown? The girls showed real resistance to his escalation. That is about him not knowing how to create these warm, “cared for” spaces that women want to step into (some of them probably felt that as early as the pickup, it starts there).
This is advanced Game. You want to fuck? Attention to these details will lead to better experiences… and more fucking.
YOU: Hey, let’s go back to my room and listen to some music
YOU: Hey, hey, hey… slow down
YOU: I am an exciting guy…
YOU: But I can read you, I can see how you feel…
YOU: Come back with me
YOU: It’ll be my job to read you, make sure you’re in a good place
YOU: If you’re not, I’ll send you home in a cab
This is where I am at in my own Game: Constantly monitoring her to see what she is ready for, testing her, moving deeper when I can see she is ready. And the girls can FEEL THAT expertise… this is how she knows you are better than some horny guy that misses her signals or will be “weird” if she is not ready. When she can feel this kind of skill, she can totally relax and be led into a great experience.
It’s not “words.” It’s not really a “technique.” It’s about reading her. I’m teaching you something very real.
If a guy isn’t sensitive at this level, it is not safe to be alone with him. His lack of attunement could put her in a dangerous place. When you lead both of you to a deeper, better place, when she can be sure you are reading and responding to her moment by moment, she can “open up” for you.
Brown’s trip is much more interesting when we look past the stats. The notes from the idates are more revealing, and show how good Brown is at some things, and some places where he can get better.
“I understood that Vegas is not a good city for daygame.”
It’s not about the city. When you dismiss an entire city like this, you miss a chance to improve your own Game.
Jaunts are “hard mode.” Most guys need time to warm up, time to become a “master of the territory,” to allow time to meet more girls and to coordinate dates.
At a more “intermediate” level: Guys can daygame Vegas, but they’ll probably need more skill around fast closes. Looking smooth will be harder for a guy if he “hasn’t settled down” or doesn’t have his logistics worked out yet. Any incongruence within himself (if he is not used to fast-pulls) will make it harder to make a quick Vegas jaunt successful.
If quick hit-and-run jaunts in a high turn-over place like a Vegas require more fast-seductions… a player has to create a lot of trust quickly. You need to know how to bring a girl to sex in a way that makes her feel safe, and excited, and sexy. And if she feels like you’re not up to the job (and that is a hard job) she is going to bail.
I don’t like Las Vegas at all, but it’s Game-able (if you can meet women there, the place is gameable). Same principles.
Regardless of the city, there are things in this post that could help lots of guys learn how to get women to “open up.”
Big thanks to BrownDaygamer for providing so much to talk about. In many ways he killed it in Vegas. I am proud of him. He’ll do much better when he can communicate that he can read girls’ feelings (at all stages of the game) at an expert level. Even in fast pull environments (maybe especially so), that is a key to mastery.
A lot I can learn from this too. A large number of numbers (read: most of them) don’t lead to dates, or historically haven’t. This particular area is one major place for me and many others to improve on.
Yeah. Taking numbers is GOOD, and it’s an important part of The Sequence. A good ratio is about 3 numbers:1 date. Maybe 5 numbers:1 date (beginners).
If you’re not getting dates from your numbers, they are weak numbers. So WHY are they weak? Could be lots of reasons (some have little to do with you)… but something to think about.
One TIP: Is it very easy for her to say “no?” Are you sure?
If there is anything about the situation that would make her MORE uncomfortable saying no than to just giving her your number… you’ll get weak numbers. If she feels pressured. If she thinks YOU need it too much (for your own validation). If she thinks you might get mad or act weird if she says no. All of those are reason why she’ll give you a number… but never respond.
If you remove all the pressure, it is not only a better experience for her, but the numbers you get will be more real.
If it’s very easy for her to say no, if she knows that… then she will only give you her number when she is into you. You’ll still get some numbers that don’t respond, but in general, the numbers will be stronger, will respond more… and you’ll move deeper into The Sequence.
Brown and I are talking via DM about this, and he asked for something specific to help him around this “last minute resistance” part of the dance.
I think I have already been very specific, but I can say more:
Here is something I wrote to him in the DM:
BEGINNER: Doesn’t know what to do, or what anything means
INTERMEDIATE: Has some skill, is very focused on HIS own performance
ADVANCED: Can read HER, guide HER emotions, more of his focus in on HER
This isn’t so much of a “technique” as it is: Where is his attention? This could be it’s own post, but check this out…
BEGINNER: Doesn’t know where to put his attention (he doesn’t understand the dance at all)
INTERMEDIATE: Know the basic structure, so he is focused on “his own” moves, “self centered”
ADVANCED: Knows the dance so well, has his part so perfect, he puts more and more attention on HER
So, stay with the “dancing metaphor.” Imagine the girl’s POV. Which man does she prefer?
BEGINNER: He is a mess, nervous, can’t lead, hard to be attracted to that
INTERMEDIATE: He is better, but is “always thinking about his next move,” can’t see beyond himself
ADVANCED: He moves so easy he puts his interested on her, guides her, notices what she likes… so attractive
They are totally different phases of understanding. Each man offers a different level of VALUE to girls. When a man knows more, when he has practice, he can “afford” to spend more of his attention on her, to be more curious, he notices more about her, he is much more RESPONSIVE, he gives her a better experience, he makes her feel more special… and because of HOW HE MAKES HER FEEL, he gets laid a lot more often.
You see that?
I am rereading this post…
“And the thing I’m most proud of was the way I calibrated with her through the night and the chemistry I was able to build. The way I moved in and out of her space. The way I turned up the psychological pressure, and then backed off, depending on where she was at and how much I thought she could handle.
This ability to move in and out with a woman… it builds trust.”
2017… I guess I have been talking about this for a long time.
“…to be extremely respectful of another person’s ecosystem, and what they’re experiencing… and the second it goes negative in any way, shape or form, you backing off. You are always aware of where she is at. And by the way, that again, will make you so great at meeting women. Because they sense that you are aware of them. And because they sense you are aware of them, there is no downside.
— RSD Tyler, from Hotseat at Home
“what they’re experiencing… and the second it goes negative in any way, shape or form, you backing off. You are always aware of where she is at”
I was quoting this years ago. And today I say almost exactly that, word for word. Good comments from Tyler there.
Yes. This is what I mean. Brown could spend some time thinking of this.